Advice To Mothers: Rule # 3 If You Wake Up Grumpy

c ,Woman one said, “When I wake up unhappy I just fake it until I am.”

Lady two said “How can you fake happy?”

I’ve often waken not wanting to get out of bed.When I was four I didn’t have this problem. What changed? That’s what I want to know. I think this should only happening if by chance you’re sleep walking and the minute you step out your front door the earth opens up under your feet, and as you fall, becoming only dimly aware of what’s going on, a jagged root catches the diamond studded dress (the Queen of England lent you on the condition you return it the way it was lent otherwise your head will be cut off) tearing the pretty thing a pretty big rip, from neck to hem, but as this realization begins to wake you a pterodactyl, once thought extinct, grabs you by the hair and launches toward the sky but the sound of more earth falling in has awakened your mother, whose visiting because she’s in recuperation from having her right arm amputated and your Mom, with a spurt of Momily adrenaline, grabs your feet with her left hand and yanks you from the antique monster’s grasp, with such super human strength, all most all of you lands in a heap at her feet, at the edge of the gaping hole, but your hair continues to fly ever higher in the talons of the pterodactyl. Blood mixed with the mascara, you didn’t take off the night before, dribbles down your arms waking you fully, but what strikes you, with all its venom, is the fact that having ridges of scars on top of your head for the rest of your life won’t at all bother you one wit because the Queen’s gonna cut off your head.
NOW I can see you waking up unhappy and grumpy
Suggestion: always remove mascara before bed. Becoming such an orderly person would have prompted you to have taken off the Queen’s dress immediately after coming home, and between these two events, world history would have changed like a butterfly in the rain forest. But on the other hand, don’t take off the make -up, discover a living dinosaur and Sigourney Weaver will play you, hairless, in the movie and waking up grumpy will be worth that.
Now the first lady explains, “Wake up grumpy= force a smile= your kids and husband will become happy= happy is contagious= you become TRUELY happy! (or as I always say, while you force that smile just remember: You’re not being beheaded today!)

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