Ever throw a party and have the wrong person show up? As when the wise men informed Herod he should be celebrating the birth of a new king? The sick old Herod killed all the baby boys?
One day John drove to the store for just one thing; suet. His friends, the crows, were telling him from the power lines, the starlings had been screaming as they huddled around the empty suet cage and sparrows had been complaining from the kiwi. John got home and loaded the cage and within seconds out of the corner of my eye I saw several flashes of movement and heard a grand THUMP on the front window. I looked at the window and I saw a giant poop. John told me it squeezed out of a panicked starling. Our occasional visitor, the hawk, knew the scenario. he and was watching and waiting for John to throw the party.
“I filled the bird feeder but I got the wrong species.” John said. The poop is too high to reach, I blog instead of hauling around the ladder, and it’s still there.  nancymauerman.com

I was blocking the refrigerator but didn’t notice it at once because I was excitedly telling John about a Science News book review. The book recommended that large organizations confront adversity creatively. They change adversity from stagnancy and decline into growth. “I’ve always tried to live the concept in my personal life.” I said. “It’s an old concept; just a new application!”
I noticed his itchy fingers and moved away from the refrigerator door. He wanted breakfast. With relief he opened the door and took out half a sandwich he’d started the day before saying, “An old concept: a new application!”
In Leafman#3 Worse than a Bugbear, we find family adversities faced in humorous and surprising ways at a family level. A threat is transformed and saves the entire city of Portland Oregon by robins. I write about families because any concept learned and grown here coverts into the greatest of all personal feelings, that of belonging, love and joy, while advancing the world around.
Thank you again Amazon for giving me the vehicle through which to stretch and share.nancymauerman.com

I was too dumb to go to college but one of them let me in anyway; they needed diversity. All through school my language skills were pretty far below grade level.
Often my interest was in chapter books but my reading abilities were limited and  put me in picture books and short stories so I read old fairy tales. Before Disney got his hands on fairy tales they were condensed examinations of the human character. Their development of plots and sub plots were pretty complicated stuff.
So I write novels for very young talented kids not yet ready for chapter  books but the same books will be of interest to older kids reading slow.  Leafman Attacks3; Worse than a Bugbear is offered free as an eBook for a few more days. Thank you for reading.  nancymauerman.com

I keep a bottle full of wet air on my windowsill to entertain me.  nancymauerman.com

My first father in law didn’t like me much at all, but he attempted to work at that dislike by calling me his daughter. I didn’t like him much either at first but his example softened me.

When the thought of him came to mind in the company of others I found it difficult to complain about, “MY father- in -law” when I used the term, “my father,” instead.
As soon as I met John’s Mother I loved, liked, and admired her; it was easy to call her, “Mom,” the same with my daughter’s partner Michelle, I call “daughter.”
A checkout lady pointed to the younger employee exclaiming, “She made me put the pterodactyl in that display although it didn’t belong there.”  The young woman was right, I noticed the pterodactyl pillow pet because it was completely out of place being the wrong color, shape, and didn’t at all fit the theme. The young lady hugged the stuffed animal goodbye.
I attempted to tell them both what an important find this pillow pet was for me. I knew Michelle would love it and her mom had just died. So I said, “My daughter’s mother just died so I need a pterodactyl! The clerks just looked confused.  nancymauerman.com

Another painter and I were discussing THE PROCESS. The times when over and over again we hang our pictures on our walls and stare for months at them because SOMETHING is wrong and we don’t know what it is. Finally one day it’s clear. We can see the problem. We get SO EXCITED. Then we wonder, “What will happen when we attempt to fix it?” The fix isn’t always easy to administer and sometimes creates a another series of problems. “Oh, boy! Yum yum!” we think every time, “MORE PROBLEMS! I wonder what will happen?”
I should be so anxious and excited to fix ME!  nancymauerman.com

Today I saw what I’ve waited years to see.
John and I stopped at a traffic light and saw a great grandma aged lady, waiting for a walk signal. She was leaning against her walker and her’s, as many others are, was outfitted like a second home. On it were a beautiful, but slightly tattered, granny square afghan, bottles, bags, and various mystery items. Her hair was very long and  half gray, and here’s what I’ve always been waiting for: She was a Granny in long big fat DREAD LOCKS!  nancymauerman.com

Manatee? I repeat, MANATEE? Target sells dresses in soft thin fabric, gathered at the neck and falling tent-like to the knees. But what I can’t believe is that they labeled those dresses, in size XX, as: “MANATEE Grey”! (especially when all smaller sizes, of the exact dress, were labeled something sweet and feminine!) John’s comment still is; “I like manatees, what’s the problem?”
It’s the flower problem: The kind of girl who would buy a soft flowing dress has priorities. Number one is to be a flower. Some flowers are frilly, some are superb in their simplicity; we can take our pick. But our aspiration is NEVER toward a puckered, blubbery, shapeless, slow moving, bobbing image!
What little girl says, “When I grow up I want to look just like a water balloon!”? Those big floaters are NOT my idea of the ideal couture.
Now manatees have been, and still are, one of my FAVORITE animals (along with slime mold!) But I have never wanted to look like one!!

And talking about a fashion statements; I’ve designed slender high shoes, with two heels. Each five inch high, somewhat slender, and the heals are separated by two inches, They support three long pointy toes, the tips of each separated by three inches. One pair= two shoes= four heals and six toes! You get a lot for your money! These lovely pedaries are featured in one of my new paintings and are designed to be manufactured in red or slime mold gold!!!  nancymauerman.com