Yesterday John announced he was going to the store to shop for a Halloween costume. He said, “I want to be a Kabuki dancer.”

But he came back empty handed.  He didn’t find anything along even close. So he reannounced, “I changed my mind. On Halloween I’m going as a nudest!” And if the kids at the door scream I’ll wear a towel. And if it slips I’ll wrap it around my head and be Lawrence of Arabia!” John is so versatile!

The picture below is from one of my dreams. A similar subject might enter the night time muzeings of the neighborhood children if John follows through on his costume. But I think he’s kidding. I hope he’s kidding! Just in case I hid the candy so there is nothing for John to hand out. nancymauerman.com

Lizards Black

Hate housework? I have a cure: write a book!

This is similar to curing a stubbed toe with a hammer. But this a cure I’ve actually known people to use. Writers sometimes sit before a screen while crazy zipknoters run back and for inside their skulls saying, “Think of something. Think of something. This isn’t working.” “Those words sound nice but they don’t mean anything.” or, “Why did you ever think you could write?” “How can I get this done on time?” “These are the best three pages I’ve ever written but I have to throw them out to make the plot work!” “Oh boy, this entire section should be in the third chapter not the sixth, the whole book should be in third person not first, and the syntex is sloppy!” or this is the zipknocker message most heard,”This is too much.  I’d rather do ANYTHING else!   I know.   I’ll do the dishes!   Problem solved.”

By the way don’t bother looking ‘zipknocker’ up in the dictionary. Writing at times can be like having four or more spots of doom hanging over your head, see picture below.

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3 Spots

Soon we’ll wear glasses and blink sending a brain message to the glasses which will overlay the person we’re looking at with information and maybe read his mind.

I heard a scientist say we’ll be linked to our televisions.  We’ll think, “What did that guy say?  I missed it,” and the television will instantly repeat the scene.  Or we may think, “This is too loud,” instantly the volume will lower.

How wonderful. I can’t wait. Envision this: a family of four is watching a movie together. The television, or telea -hologram probably, will constantly go back a few frames which will break the emotional flow for a second person. Then it will zoom forward for someone who doesn’t want to see the thing twice and this will be way too fast for a third person. And what’s loud for one is too quiet for another. The volume will pop up and down suddenly, often startling the others.

Each member of the family will blink at each other in frustration, then angrily as they READ EACH OTHER MIND’S. Who knows they might even stare real daggers at each other.

John close up

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I know why ancient people paid a lot of money for salt. John bought me some V8, very healthy especially because it had no Na Cl. But for discerning pallets I do not recommend it!

“Ah ha,” I thought, “I have a cup of V8 here and a cup of fruit juice in the refrigerator. I’ve heard of the veggie juice mixed with fruit juice. It’s suppose to be DELICIOUS and healthy.

Anyone glancing through my front window would think I’d over dosed on an energy drink. I stomped around in a circle shaking my head. The juice company must have leaned heavily on the fruit side because, well let me put it this way; I DO RECOMMEND this drink but only if your serving it to your enemies.  nancymauerman.com

Nancy And John

I heard someone say, “We should legislate against mistakes.”  We wouldn’t need to worry about learning from our mistakes because “they” could do all the thinking and deciding; do all the hard work for us. Plus if “they” ever wanted to pounce they’d have plenty of reasons because saying the words of a law does not  change behavior. Would this be a staircase up or down.

The picture below is from my silly book, ‘Old McDonald Had a Haunted House’ which is free as an eBook at Amazon.   nancymauerman.com

Staircase – Old MacDonald Had A Haunted House